Losing a dear one and that combined with a great human being, no wealth in the world can compensate that. My mother was a wonderful human being and a very quite person, whose most of the days used to spend in the kitchen only. She was very fair and just around 5’ or little over. She was an asthmatic patient, in those days there were not much options for this chronic disease. We were having privilege of getting all best medical benefit from TMH (Tata Main Hospital), during winter and monsoon mother was a frequent visitor to the hospital and often used get admitted.
I was getting ready for my first board examination, just couple of month away from it and then one-day mother have to admit in the hospital, it was nothing new to us. I visited her that particular evening, met her at the hospital, just could not make it very next day for something and finally in the afternoon day after that I managed to sneaked in the hospital, as it was not a normal visiting hour, found her in ventilator. Frankly, I was not too worried, because we were very novice and even having no idea about that machine called ventilator. The nurse who was attending her was very sympathetic to me; tensed twenty-four hours passed that way. After visiting her next morning I came back home for lunch but could not able to have it, by some instinct instantly gone back to the hospital. I saw the same nurse who was attending my mother on the corridor and when she saw me she just turn back and moved to the other way, I failed to get the signal. It was all over. My mothers’ very quite presence in the house became a reality, it was really very quite over there and only memory of her that remains. With in a few days I was normal and start preparing for my board examination, even overheard my classmate “everybody have to move on, no matter whatever happened”. However, I was wrong as well as she too, my life is never as same as it was and with every passing day, it keep sinking in me. I still can narrate every word of which taken place during my last visit to her in the hospital. May be by death she become an integral part of me.
I was then very young and new to Mumbai; she was having three kids and younger one just a few months old. When we met for the first time, we just smiled to each other, next instant she told me to visit her and she used to do so whenever she met me thereafter. Later I came to know that her respect for Bengali’s, what made her taking bit more interest towards me. Therefore, I started visiting her and that was where it started, a long-standing relationship, which was having no name. Her house was always my second home. Whenever any good things or vice-versa happened in our life, we were first person to tell each other. Her husband treated me like a sister and to her vast family whoever were there I was treated like a one of them. Even when I used to get sick, she never allowed me to go back home and taken care of me. In my case whenever I back from anywhere after landing Mumbai, my first destination was always her house. Once we both were going through some financial problem and one evening she came to my place with all smile to handover a few bucks which she got from somewhere. I told her
- Come on! I will take care of it; you have a family to look after.
She was one who never gives up. We were two different individual, having lots of different opinion, coming from different cultural background but at the same time shares many common bonds, enjoyed our outings, movies, tennis, game of cricket with lots of enthu. My last visit to Mumbai I stayed with her couple of days, she was disturbed for certain thing and pours her heart to me and then I last talked to her on Diwali before last one.
Last year one night I was doing something that now these days I hardly do, reading a storybook. Around 9.30 p.m., her niece (a friend of mine and like a sister to me) called me on my cell to inform that Chikki (aunt) is no more, within few hours she was gone.
I took it very coolly as if nothing happened and back to my reading, then had my dinner and finally gone to sleep and then its started sinking in me, memories of all those thirty years, everything. I just can see her in our first meeting in a housing board building third floor staircase and smiling to each other. It took me almost seven-eight days and a few sleeping pills to recover. I was very down and some of my close students helped me out with their counseling.
I was getting ready for my first board examination, just couple of month away from it and then one-day mother have to admit in the hospital, it was nothing new to us. I visited her that particular evening, met her at the hospital, just could not make it very next day for something and finally in the afternoon day after that I managed to sneaked in the hospital, as it was not a normal visiting hour, found her in ventilator. Frankly, I was not too worried, because we were very novice and even having no idea about that machine called ventilator. The nurse who was attending her was very sympathetic to me; tensed twenty-four hours passed that way. After visiting her next morning I came back home for lunch but could not able to have it, by some instinct instantly gone back to the hospital. I saw the same nurse who was attending my mother on the corridor and when she saw me she just turn back and moved to the other way, I failed to get the signal. It was all over. My mothers’ very quite presence in the house became a reality, it was really very quite over there and only memory of her that remains. With in a few days I was normal and start preparing for my board examination, even overheard my classmate “everybody have to move on, no matter whatever happened”. However, I was wrong as well as she too, my life is never as same as it was and with every passing day, it keep sinking in me. I still can narrate every word of which taken place during my last visit to her in the hospital. May be by death she become an integral part of me.
I was then very young and new to Mumbai; she was having three kids and younger one just a few months old. When we met for the first time, we just smiled to each other, next instant she told me to visit her and she used to do so whenever she met me thereafter. Later I came to know that her respect for Bengali’s, what made her taking bit more interest towards me. Therefore, I started visiting her and that was where it started, a long-standing relationship, which was having no name. Her house was always my second home. Whenever any good things or vice-versa happened in our life, we were first person to tell each other. Her husband treated me like a sister and to her vast family whoever were there I was treated like a one of them. Even when I used to get sick, she never allowed me to go back home and taken care of me. In my case whenever I back from anywhere after landing Mumbai, my first destination was always her house. Once we both were going through some financial problem and one evening she came to my place with all smile to handover a few bucks which she got from somewhere. I told her
- Come on! I will take care of it; you have a family to look after.
She was one who never gives up. We were two different individual, having lots of different opinion, coming from different cultural background but at the same time shares many common bonds, enjoyed our outings, movies, tennis, game of cricket with lots of enthu. My last visit to Mumbai I stayed with her couple of days, she was disturbed for certain thing and pours her heart to me and then I last talked to her on Diwali before last one.
Last year one night I was doing something that now these days I hardly do, reading a storybook. Around 9.30 p.m., her niece (a friend of mine and like a sister to me) called me on my cell to inform that Chikki (aunt) is no more, within few hours she was gone.
I took it very coolly as if nothing happened and back to my reading, then had my dinner and finally gone to sleep and then its started sinking in me, memories of all those thirty years, everything. I just can see her in our first meeting in a housing board building third floor staircase and smiling to each other. It took me almost seven-eight days and a few sleeping pills to recover. I was very down and some of my close students helped me out with their counseling.
Big thanks to these two wonderful women, one who brought me to this world and other I met by chance. Wish you two a very very happy women’s day. In this world, no one deserves it more than you two do.
!!!Memory of loving one, Just like old wine, with time it gets better, only one make you high and other leave you very dry!!!
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